That person (me) has spent over 1000 hours on Roblox, voted most likely to go to jail, failed PE class. Still figured out every dark mango manipulation tactic the SAT tries to hide from you, and now teaches them in an unhinged way.
400
(Fell Asleep) 😴
→
1590
YOUR HOT, SEXY, 6'4 TUTOR
"If I cracked it, even you can crack it! Everyone can crack everything!"
Why this works
1)
Efficient and Entertaining
Combines science-backed methods (spaced repetition, active recall) with unhinged instruction to keep you on your toes and retain way more information, even if the SAT is in 1 week.
Study smarter, not harder.
2)
One-on-one Mentorship
Most tutors are old, smelly, fat white guys who pick their nose and don't know what they're talking about. We offer a tutor in the top 1% of scorers who don't scare away children (and can bench 315).
Relatable. Real. Recent.
3)
Leave with more than a score
Ensure you never pay for another class. We build self-study habits, sharper focus, and problem-solving instincts that question the "why?" and stick long after test day. Skills for the SAT and everything after.
Beyond the test.
+360Avg. score increase
93%Hit their goal score
4.9★Avg. rating
Real talk
Every feeling you've had about the SAT is valid.
And also temporary. We promise.
😵💫
"I keep rereading the same sentence over and over again."
The most common reading problem, and one of the easiest to fix. We cover annotations and the highlighter tool in our first class.
🤡
"I was too focused on how my proctor had no eyebrows."
No eyebrow guarantees. But we do guarantee a 360-point increase and distraction-blocking strategies — ADHD-friendly too.
😩
"I studied for two weeks and my score went DOWN."
How is this even possible?!! We focus on long-term success by improving your studying habits and not just your materials.
😶
"I think I'm just slow."
This is BS. The SAT is a learnable, coachable test that rewards effort. It's filled with recognisable patterns that repeat.
sound familiar?
The searches stop here.
You already know the answers aren't on Google.
What we cover
Every part of the SAT, demystified.
We don't sugarcoat it — the SAT tests specific things. Here's all of them, explained like a human.
Math
From basic algebra to quadratics, we break down every concept with plain English explanations and step-by-step walkthroughs. No assumed knowledge. No skipping steps.
Linear equationsQuadraticsRatios & percentagesWord problemsData & stats
Reading Comprehension
Reading comprehension seems the hardest to learn but is the easiest to master. The SAT repeats patterns over and over and over again, with dead giveaways pointing to the answer.
Main idea questionsInference trapsEvidence pairingAuthor's purposeTone & attitude
Writing, Grammar & Vocab
Exactly 15 grammar rules count for almost 20% of your SAT score. The first 4 questions are always vocab in context and are logic games more often than not — can be easily cracked by context clues.
There's way too many real-world concepts like evolution, supply-and-demand, and etymology tested on the SAT. Knowing these concepts beforehand saves you so much time.
Mcdonald's was calling me to work there and I almost picked up UNTIL I discovered sat4retards and got a 1500 on my 3rd try, idk bro let the numbers speak for themselves
BigBlackBaller
Went from 1140 → 1500
"
super niche community and super niche teacher, i'm lowk gonna gatekeep this and reduce the competition DONT GO if you don't wanna increase ur score
Alex
Went from 1050 → 1430
"
I have ADHD and he solved this problem by teaching me how to annotate passages and keep focus, and he kept me accountable and motivated. his lessons are all really fun and there's no way you fall asleep
Joseph
Went from 990 → 1370
Pricing
The Materials
Self-study. No tutor needed.
$100
$49
one-time · instant access
✓ Custom diagnostic harder than the real SAT
✓ 1,000 most common SAT vocab words
✓ Full grammar rules sheet
✓ Full math rules sheet
✓ Desmos regression guide
✓ Hard question bank (reading + math)
✗ Tutoring sessions
The Standard
Try it free, then commit.
$650
$495
one-time · 4 sessions total
✓1 free session to start
✓ 3 paid sessions after that
✓ Pre-session diagnostic
✓ Custom study plan
✓ Homework between sessions
✓ Unlimited chat support
✗ Personal phone number
Best value
The VIP
All in. Direct line to your tutor.
$1400
$995
one-time · 11 sessions total
✓3 free sessions to start
✓ 8 paid sessions after that
✓ Everything in Standard
✓ Custom study plan
✓ Homework between sessions
✓ Unlimited chat support
✓My personal phone number 📱
Only 2 spots open this week.
Questions we get a lot
How are lessons structured?
+
We go grammar/vocab first, then quadratics/word problems/linear regression, then reading comprehension, then geometry. I give homework personalized to improve weaknesses. Every topic follows the same 3-step format: (1) the pattern, (2) a worked example, (3) a fun, engaging exercise, repeated.
How far in advance should I start?
+
Ideally 2 months before your test date. But even 2 weeks of focused, structured prep can significantly boost your score. Earlier is always better.
What platform will you use for lessons?
+
Discord. It's the most accessible and efficient platform.
